The following is an excerpt from the article “Reinventing Your Life: Eight Self-Change Strategies That Work,” which appeared in the Apr-Jun 2004 issue of Yogoda Satsanga magazine. Lawrence Martin, a longtime Kriyaban devotee of SRF, lives in Southern California.
It’s time to pause and notice the inner conversation you are having within yourself. What do you say when you talk to yourself? Are you complimentary? Are you encouraging?
Negative self-talk causes us to doubt, be unsure, worry, and lack confidence. Positive self-talk provides strong new messages to help us overcome longtime fears and obstacles, become more confident, as well as look, act, and feel more in control.
Paying Attention to the Types of Self-Talk
Psychologist Shad Helmstetter, Ph.D., in What to Say When You Talk to Your Self, describes various levels of self-talk with which we programme our subconscious mind. Pay attention, he suggests, to the kind of “I” statements you feed your mind, such as:
—“I can’t.” Helmstetter calls this the worst type and, unfortunately, one of the most common “programmes” we feed the mind. Attentiveness to your use of this phrase will help you to root out negative, self-limiting beliefs and replace them with positive goals for improvement.
— “I should.” This is better, but still basically negative, Helmstetter says, because you have recognized a problem but are not focusing on a solution.
— “I never.” or “I no longer.” At this level, self-talk starts working for you instead of against you, says Helmstetter. You have recognized the need to change and made the decision to do something about it. Most important, you are expressing it to yourself as though the change has already taken place, which helps to reprogramme the subconscious mind.
— “I am.” Here you are affirming to the subconscious a new image of yourself, the fruition of your ideals and goals for self-change. This kind of self-talk is the opposite of “I can’t”; it mobilizes the power of your subconscious mind to help you rather than to keep you stuck in negative psychological ruts.
Start Now, Try Now — and Change Your Life
Start working on your self-talk immediately. Notice the next negative comment you give yourself; try to rephrase the statement into something positive. And practise visualization and affirmation during your leisure time — see and describe yourself as having made the change you are seeking. Eventually you will be able to stop negative self-talk in mid sentence.
Created by Paramahansa Yogananda, author of the spiritual classic Autobiography of a Yogi, Yogoda Satsanga has been introducing seekers of higher consciousness to the timeless universal truths of Yoga, India’s ancient science of uniting the soul with Spirit and living a life of harmony and well-being. Yogoda Satsanga is currently an annual print issue with a subscription option providing an extensive online library of past articles from Paramahansaji, past and current YSS/SRF presidents, and other favourite SRF and YSS authors.
